Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Paying It Forward

I remember a little over 2 years, 3 months ago, I made the decision that I was going to finally quit smoking. I was on my 2nd day and I found this website called WhyQuit.com and was going to really try and give this quitting thing a solid attempt. I was excited, but I was also scared. When it came to quitting, all I knew was failure. I was full of questions about being able to quit and probably more full of doubts about doing it. So I started reading people's posts at the Freedom board and started seeing something that I haven't seen before trying to quit. I started seeing hope. I started to see that I wasn't alone about my fears and doubts about quitting. I started to see that I wasn't alone,quit smoking now, period about quitting. I read about people who had been quit a month. Who were talking about how much better they already felt. I thought to myself, " Wow, 1 month. That would be great if I could do that." I read about people who were quit for mutliple months and people quit for around 6 months and thought, " That would be great if I could quit for 6 months. I would love that!! That would be something!!" What made me stop and ponder though was reading about these people who had been quit for a year and longer. Reading these people's posts. They all had one thing in common. This confidence about quitting. This knowledge that they seemed to have and a comfort that I knew absolutely nothing about. The responses they gave to the newbies. You could see there was no hesitation in their words and they all said the same thing, " Just hang in there. It will get better!!" These people had me in awe. Being quit for a year or longer? Even though they sounded completely happy, I just couldn't seem to wrap my head around this. It seemed to big for me to grasp. It felt a little too overwhelming. A little too intimidating, but what did I have to lose by trying? So I joined WhyQuit. In my early days, I was glued to the computer(hhmmm,stop smoking, much like I am today, LOL) . I spent hours and hours, day in and day out reading about this thing called nicotine addiction. I learned what to expect and what not to expect about quitting. Out of all the information that I learned there. There was one piece of information that was repeated often and probably the most important thing to remember. That was to Never Take Another Puff. Huh, how simple is that? How for some reason, this never ever occured to me when I tried to quit before. As a matter of fact I never thought of myself as really a nicotine addict. I just thought it was a really bad habit, that I couldn't seem to break. It was the lack of this simple piece of information that made all my pasts quits fail. So everyday I would just not take a puff. I had days that were good days and I had days that were bad days. I had days where I felt depressed and days that were amazing. There was even a stretch in my quit where for a lack of a better word, it just felt surreal. Everytime I had doubts or questions or was going through a difficult stretch, I would post about it. Every single time, these seasoned quitters would answer my posts and give me an insight that I just didn't see before. They just always seemed to have the answers to every question I ever had and once again they all said the same thing. "Hang in there, because it will get better, I promise!" Sometimes I embraced this cliche' and honestly, sometimes I just didn't want to hear it, but no matter how I felt, I just kept the faith that they were telling me the truth about this thing called comfort. As time went on. This comfort thing did start to happen. I actually did start to feel more calm. My perspective really did start to change. I was actually doing this and not only that, I was loving it!! They were right. These oldies weren't lying to me. I was actually starting to feel this elusive thing called comfort. Fast forward to today. Today I can honestly say that I love not smoking!! I have a calmness about me that I never had when I smoked. There is not a single thing I miss about smoking! I don't, for one second, take this wonderful gift of freedom for granted! At the same time, I'm not sure if I have ever been more confident about anything in my whole life, than being a happy nonsmoker. I'm still amazed at the transformation from then to now. Going from uncertain and scared to completely confident and free. It really feels amazing. I don't make it over to WhyQuit much these days, but I have alot of people there to thank for helping me quit. Not just Joel, but countless oldbies, who allways held their hand out to me to pick me up when I needed it. To inspire me when I felt uninspired. To tell me that they knew how I felt, because at one time they were there too. To give me a 3rd person unbiased look at how I was feeling. To give the tough love when I needed it. I owe alot to these people. I think the best way to pay this debt is to try and pay it forward and I think that they would agree. There was another thing that those seasoned quitters always told me that, today I think is very very important to tell the new quitters here and I cannot stress this part enough. Seasoned quitters are NO different than you. They DON'T have anything that you don't have. Seasoned quitters are NOT the exception to the rule. They are NOT the "few lucky ones" who were at the right place, at the right time and the stars aligned and gave them this magical power to quit. They ARE only people who has followed one simple rule a little longer than the newer quitter. That is simply to Never Take Another Puff. As long as you practice this one rule. It will get better. It will get to be fantastic! You will find that comfort that seasoned quitters keep telling you about. You will find an inner calmness that you haven't felt since before you started smoking and you will be living life as you again. On your terms, not addiction's. Keep the faith! You might be starting to feel that comfort already! Before you know it. It is going to be you comforting the newbies. It is going to be you telling them to hang in there, because it is only going to get better and that they will find their comfort and you're going to be able to say this with the utmost conviction and confidence, because you will know that it really is true!! When I see the newer quitter's doubts start to diminish and their confidence start to grow. That's what makes me smile. I love it!! It is awsome to see this tranformation. To see the people who were once full of questions, are now full of answers. This is the great gift of paying it forward!!Have a good day,Eric

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