Chantix Newbie here

I have had three colds since my daughter started Kindergarten in September. I have been a smoker for 28 years. This cold hit me particularly hard. I developed asthma like symptoms and couldn't breathe. I also couldn't smoke either. For two days I used an inhaler. Then I went to the doctor. He put me on antibiotics and offered me the Chantix ,stop smokingquit smoking program. I have taken it for 4 days. It is supposed to be a gradual start,quit smoking, where you can smoke in the first week, but I haven't smoked a whole ciggy for 6 days. I light one and hold it and breathe in the smoke a little, but there is no way I can inhale, because when I have tried, I go into a coughing fit. My ribs are so sore I can barely take in a full breath. I am 42 and I started smoking when I was 14. It has been a permanent way of life for me. I used to be kinda cute, but I really have aged in the last 10 years. So much so that I can hardly stand to look in the mirror now. My self-esteem is the lowest it has ever been. I decided after not being able to breathe that maybe now I have to. I am scared, but I am hoping I will feel better in the future. Look a little better, although I am not expecting too much there. Just thought I would pop in and read some of the advice you all have for the BIG DECISION...